Welcome to This Week in Softball - The Smells Like Teen Spirit Edition
WHERE HAVE ALL THE PILOTS GONE
It was a brutal loss last night folks. We will not, nor can we, sugar coat the game results. The severely, depleted, Bush Pilots squad was defeated 22-2, in a game that seemed further out of reach that that. We here at TWIS were almost giddy with happiness that the VA Team didn't score 30 fuggin' runs on us. We did manage to get 10 Pilots to the game and even threw in Jeffro Bardelli's son, Cam, and Dugger's son, Jordan. Hell, why not? These boys have seen their dads lose for years now, why not make them a part of these beatdowns to understand our standing in world of softball.
Which leads us to: WHERE HAVE ALL THE BUSH PILOTS GONE? You fuggers have more excuses. Well, actually this week, no one even bothered to give excuses. Hell, half of ya never responded. WTF people? Man up already. One game left. We expect you there!!!
COACH PROC HITS FOR THE CYCLE
Not really, but he did go 3 for 3 in this disgusting mess of a game and at this time would like to congratulate himself. We believe when a Bush Pilots congratulates oneself, its called, "masterbushing".
SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT
"Smells Like Teen Spirit" - Dawg, when asked to comment on theme of the night. Due to the youngsters participating on our game, this is a very fitting term.
And, its a cool Nirvana video too...
NO LOOPS
Can Return Al was back in the house! We had feared the worst (dude is looking bad), but he made a triumphant return. It was pointed out, he wore a belt to hold up his pants, yet the pants didn't have any belt loops. We offer this as proof of the No Loop Pants Syndrome:
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HURRY UP WITH MY CANS BITCH
At one point, CRA pulled up in the dented, yet stylish Taurus and kept laying on the horn. This was to get Mitch to hurry up and collect cans for him. Soon, Grasshopper Mitch will snatch the pebble from the Master's hand and the cycle will become complete. To hell with the old show Kung Fu, we got the makings of a new show, Can Fu!
FACIAL HAIR
"Draw a mustache on your face next time." -Coach Proc to Dugger's son Jordan, after Nipsy the Ump called him out for being too young to play.
BUGS IN THE PISSER
Mitchy gets the weekly award (normally given to Dusty for seeing naked men in the shower) for seeing something odd in the Rotunda Fields whiz house last night. Pre-game, Mitchy went in there to whiz and saw bugs coming up from the drain of the urinals. Yes, bugs, many of them, crawling up and out of the urinal. EWWWWWW. That building is so fuggin' sickening.
NIPSY NIPPIN'
The umps were once again sitting at the picnic table near the Rotunda Outhouse and were drinking beer out of paper bags. Rotunda is such a classy, fuckin' joint.
TRI TIP AND DOGS
A big thank you to BigAl for bringing the hot dogs and to Big Country for bringing the Tri Tip. As usual, "K"ramer outdid himself on the grill. That tri tip was awesome!
NEXT WEEK
We apologize for the shortened TWIS, but Coach Proc is at home enjoying the last day of his vacation which for most of the week saw him and the family kickin' it back on the beach up in the Traverse City area. There was no photoshop software available in which to mess with you bastards, but it will return next week.
Speaking of next week, its the last regular season game. We think we have a playoff game the week after, but aren't sure.
With that said, get to the game next week. End of story.
See ya next week at 6:30 at the ballyard.
-COACH PROC
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