Those who smell like ass, people who drink beer out of paper bags and then decide balls and strikes at sporting events, beef eaters and those named Cam, Jordanian, Jason and Al...
Welcome to This Week in Softball - The Smells Like Teen Spirit Edition
WHERE HAVE ALL THE PILOTS GONE
It was a brutal loss last night folks. We will not, nor can we, sugar coat the game results. The severely, depleted, Bush Pilots squad was defeated 22-2, in a game that seemed further out of reach that that. We here at TWIS were almost giddy with happiness that the VA Team didn't score 30 fuggin' runs on us. We did manage to get 10 Pilots to the game and even threw in Jeffro Bardelli's son, Cam, and Dugger's son, Jordan. Hell, why not? These boys have seen their dads lose for years now, why not make them a part of these beatdowns to understand our standing in world of softball.
Which leads us to: WHERE HAVE ALL THE BUSH PILOTS GONE? You fuggers have more excuses. Well, actually this week, no one even bothered to give excuses. Hell, half of ya never responded. WTF people? Man up already. One game left. We expect you there!!!
COACH PROC HITS FOR THE CYCLE
Not really, but he did go 3 for 3 in this disgusting mess of a game and at this time would like to congratulate himself. We believe when a Bush Pilots congratulates oneself, its called, "masterbushing".
SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT
"Smells Like Teen Spirit" - Dawg, when asked to comment on theme of the night. Due to the youngsters participating on our game, this is a very fitting term.
And, its a cool Nirvana video too...
NO LOOPS
Can Return Al was back in the house! We had feared the worst (dude is looking bad), but he made a triumphant return. It was pointed out, he wore a belt to hold up his pants, yet the pants didn't have any belt loops. We offer this as proof of the No Loop Pants Syndrome:
HURRY UP WITH MY CANS BITCH
At one point, CRA pulled up in the dented, yet stylish Taurus and kept laying on the horn. This was to get Mitch to hurry up and collect cans for him. Soon, Grasshopper Mitch will snatch the pebble from the Master's hand and the cycle will become complete. To hell with the old show Kung Fu, we got the makings of a new show, Can Fu!
FACIAL HAIR
"Draw a mustache on your face next time." -Coach Proc to Dugger's son Jordan, after Nipsy the Ump called him out for being too young to play.
BUGS IN THE PISSER
Mitchy gets the weekly award (normally given to Dusty for seeing naked men in the shower) for seeing something odd in the Rotunda Fields whiz house last night. Pre-game, Mitchy went in there to whiz and saw bugs coming up from the drain of the urinals. Yes, bugs, many of them, crawling up and out of the urinal. EWWWWWW. That building is so fuggin' sickening.
NIPSY NIPPIN'
The umps were once again sitting at the picnic table near the Rotunda Outhouse and were drinking beer out of paper bags. Rotunda is such a classy, fuckin' joint.
TRI TIP AND DOGS
A big thank you to BigAl for bringing the hot dogs and to Big Country for bringing the Tri Tip. As usual, "K"ramer outdid himself on the grill. That tri tip was awesome!
NEXT WEEK
We apologize for the shortened TWIS, but Coach Proc is at home enjoying the last day of his vacation which for most of the week saw him and the family kickin' it back on the beach up in the Traverse City area. There was no photoshop software available in which to mess with you bastards, but it will return next week.
Speaking of next week, its the last regular season game. We think we have a playoff game the week after, but aren't sure.
With that said, get to the game next week. End of story.
People who are playas, chicks that play catcher, steroid users, men who shower at softball parks and those named Trevor, Travis, Mike and Pocahontas...
Welcome to This Week in Softball - The Down Low Edition
Well America, we are back. Yes. Back. You bastages bitched and moaned like school girls due to the lack of TWIS the past two weeks. Rain outs and work got in the way, so shut the fug up already, cuz we're back! Y'all missed the Bush Pilots didn't ya?
THE GAME PART 1
The Men of Summertime took the field at 6:35pm last night under beautiful sunny skies and temps in the low 80s. Our opponent in the first game was Sons of Pitches. It was a team of mostly young guys who didn't appear to be a day over 25. We beat 'em down 16-7 and had a good time doing it. Yes, they played a chick at catcher, so anything less than a win in this game would've constituted pure sissy man gayness on our part, but we digress. We graciously accepted our victory and moved on to the second game.
STOP HAMMER TIME
No, it wasn't hammer time, but once again, it was SHOWERTIME! What do we mean by this? It means our man Dusty once again took a pre-game whiz only to see a grown man nekkid in the Rotunda showers. What makes this so fugging suspect is that members of the Bush Pilots investigated this shower weeks earlier only to come to the conclusion that their was no way to turn on the water. So, we would like to know, WHY THE F*CK IS THERE A NAKED UMPIRE IN THE SHOWER ROOM EVERYTIME DUSTY TAKES A PRE-GAME WHIZ? Much like bucking in for the umps, we are going to suggest putting in some money for Dusty to go to therapy. No man needs to see this. No good can come of this.
And seeing as the title of this section refers to a classic M.C. Hammer tune, we bring you this old skool video of the Hammertime itself, "U Can't Touch This"....
THE GAME PART 2
Our second game featured a matchup vs. The Mustangs, a team we have all decided is the team we hate the most. Its a team full of smartass dickheads. The game was delayed to due to Shower Ump disappearing for 15 minutes. Later it was found out, he went near the Shower Shack to knock back a 40 oz. beer. Good thing he umped hammered in the second game. Wow another hammered reference in TWIS, we are liking this. As for the game, we lost 11-4. It pisses us off to lose to this team as they aren't that good. Sunsabitches.
THE TREV AND TRAV SHOW
We'd like to thank Trevor and Travis for showing up and making us look like a real team. Both are younger guys who can play the outfield, which helped us out tremendously. Thank you fellas. Come back. You are needed on Team Bush.
We here at TWIS, think Trev and Trav sounds like the name of a Disney Channel Show.
NOLAN DUGGER
We'd like to sent out congratulations to our pitcher, Doug "Nolan Ryan" Bryant on breaking his season-season strikeout record as he fanned 2 more last night to bring his total to 12 on the year. Sure, strikeout number 11 was against a girl, but it still counts. We also would like to send props to him for not celebrating the afforementioned strikeout of the girl as it would've been Bush League.
NO MORE DP FOR BC
To get Big Country out of his hitting into double play funk, Coach Proc had him lead off both games last night. This ensured the first at-bat could not be a double play. Big Country responded well and hit the ball like a madman last night.
POKEALOTTATWAT
In between games, our man Dawg found an arrowhead last night while opening his first Labatt Blue Light. It made him reflect on our nation's history and specifically that of our Native American brothers and sisters. As he talked about the arrowhead, he referred to Pocahantas, the fine, Native American chick. However, Dawg referred to either her or the whole finding-the-arrow-situation as "Pokalottatwat".
Dawg knows Native American history. Look for him this fall at Henry Ford Community College. He'll be teaching the class "American Indians, Their Weapons, Woman and Gettin' Busy" (History 169).
We recommend all of you register for this class.
BOBBY TK
Many years ago, when the Bush Pilots were called BBoomers, we used to have a guy on the team named Bobby. Bobby was a spaz. Literally. He must've had ADHD or some stupid hyper-active disease, because he was always talking, running, moving, etc. We also used to have a guy named Tim (T.K.) on the team. T.K. looked like Magnum P.I. (Tom Selleck). We only mention this because the Mustangs have a guy on their team that is a Spaz and looks just like T.K., right down to the mullet T.K. used to sport
We offer this photo of T.K. from the Bush Pilot archives. Damn if the Mullet Spaz from The Mustangs doesn't look like him.
LIONS WIN THE SUPER BOWL
This has nothing to do with softball, but our beloved Lions win The Super Bowl in Madden 11, defeating Peyton Manning and the Colts. We here at TWIS know this is the closest the Lions will ever come to actually winning the damn thing. We've watched it 15 times and have teared up everytime. Someone get us some Kleenex. We're sobbing like bitches watching vampire movies at this...
HUMAN GROWTH HORMONE
"Is UPS Greg on HGH?" - Dugger during the first game last night.
And who can blame Dugger for making this accusation? No one. UPS has made diving plays, hit the ball like a madman and thrown like a stud all season. His bionic hip is nothing short of a miracle.
UPS is the man.
GOING YARD AT COMERICA
We just wanted to send some accolades out to Mitchy and "K"ramer on getting to hit off former Detroit Tiger, Dave Rozema, at Comerica Park a few weeks ago. Here are some pictures:
The men with Dave Rozema outside the Tigers dugout.
The Comerica Park sign.
"K"ramer and the old man, Jim Leyland.
Mitchy and Leyland.
Mitchy taking away a home run in dead centerfield.
Mitchy hits one 325 ft off Dave Rozema. It almost goes out of the park but falls just short.
MEAN JOE GREEN MOMENT
Before departing the shitty confines of Rotunda Fields, Mitchy and Coach Proc decided to visit the whizzer. It was locked, so the appropriate business was done behind the building. On the walk back, they stumbled upon Nipsy Russell the Umpire. Of course, as you all know from an earlier edition of TWIS, this ump looks and sounds like, now-deceased, comedian, Nipsy Russell. What ensued was a 15 minute conversation with the man. He told us of his baseball/softball prowess and how he used to play "With a fifth and a case of beer." Dude reflected like a mutha fugger and talked about playing ball at a park in Detroit called "Jane Park". It turns out Mitchy had played there to and the bonding moment was on full force. Later, Nipsy took off his ump jersey and threw it to Mitch. Coach Proc snapped this picture.
NEXT WEEK
We play a team we haven't played before, "VA", at 6:30 on Field #5. Be there, and yes, bring a dollar. Coach Proc will hopefully make it at game time as he will be coming back into town that day. If not, coordinate things until he gets there.
SOMEONE BRING SOMETHING TO GRILL YOU CHEAP BASTARDS. Seriously. Only a handful of you have brought food.
Only a few games left fellas. Let's make the most of 'em.
Those who speak German, Charlie Brown, Those who hit into double plays, Consumers of Beef, Flashers and those named Joern, Mitchell, James and Marc...
This Week in Softball - The Just Say Nein Edition
Well sportsfans, the season's horrendous play continues as the Bush Pilots dropped to a horrific 1-10 record. Yes. 10 losses. BUT, we continue to be champions of drinking and eating, so we guess that makes up for the shittiest softball playing ever.
Now, onto the game! THIS IS A SHITSTORM
We were thoroughly man-handled by the Pterodactyls again last night by a final score of 14-2.
How bad was it?
We believe the Bush Pilots hit into 4 double plays. Yes, 4 of them. WTF? It was ugly. Pterodactyls were running loose everywhere. Coach Proc truly believed he had put in the best lineup of the season only to see it go to shit. At one point, he uttered, "This is a shit storm!" And damn if it wasn't. Fuggin' ugly it was.
In the nightcap, Team Bush fought valiantly, but was taken down 3-0, by arguably the best squad in the league from Village Ford.
WELCOME BACK
We'd like to welcome back our long, long, long, lost friend and former coach, T.C.! After many months of babysitting and surfing for adult-related web-content, our man finally surfaced at Rotunda Fields and had several of the very few hits the Bush Pilots had all night. Its about time you showed, T.C.!
We also welcomed back our most-manliest man, Jeffy, who was 6 for 6 or 10 for 10 or whatever he said he was last night. He felt so good (it must've been his cut off sleeved shirt that showed his guns) that he moved himself into the clean-up spot in Game 2. You da man, Jump.
DOUBLE COUNTRY
Poor Big Country.
He hit into quite a few double plays last night and was not a happy camper about it.
TRI-TIP RETURNS
We send out a HUGE thank you, yet again, to Mister James Cramer ("K"ramer), ladies and gentlemen, for brining and grilling up the Tri-Tip, once again. It was outstanding!
Thank you to BigAl for bringing the hot dogs and buns (thank your wife Alyson for us, BigAl)
MORE TRI-TIP
These pics speak for themselves!
Yum.
Slicing and dicing!
Lining up for the feast.
NEIN!
Focker practiced his parenting skills last night on Joern's kids. You see, our man Focker has a newborn at home (Baby Maks) and was getting into the groove for when Maks gets a bit older. As Joern's kids ran past Focker, he yelled at them very loudly and said, "NEIN!", which, of course, means "NO" in German (Joern and his kids came here from Germany). Instantly, the rugrats stopped and looked at Focker in fear. Focker felt great power at that moment and later tried to use this line again, only this time, the little fellas laughed at him and ignored him, much like we do.
DADDY DAY CARE
BFF's Hose and Schmenge ran up to 7-11 for some beer and when they came back had decided to open a daycare business. Hose said Schmenge would be watching the children and he would provide emergency medical care.
We wish these two nothing but the best in this business endeavor.
FLASHER IN AUSCHWITZ
Coach Proc, Mitchy and Dawg (and later joined by Jump) hit the Auschwitz bathroom last night and after whizzing, promptly decided to have a full-scale investigation of the Rotunda shower room. After much inspection, it was found out that the water would not turn on in the shower.
Why is this important?
Because last week, our man Dusty saw a dude towelling off in there. How could this be if the water won't turn on?
There is a flasher at Rotunda Auschwitz.
GOODBYE JOERN
We'd like to say goodbye and best of luck to Bush Pilots fan, Joern. He and his family won't be working with Mitchy and "K"ramer anymore and are moving to Atlanta. And GO GERMANY in the World Cup!
NEXT WEEK
No game next week. Its a bye week due to the 4th of July holiday. We are back in action on the 15th! It'll be a single game. Bring $1 for the ump. Anyone want to bring something for the grill? Step up!
In the meantime, have a great Independance Day Holiday. God Bless America!
Those who look like the Oakland Raiders, Nipsy Russell, former Boston Red Sox shortstops, Natty Lovers and guys named Brian, Neil, Joern and Mike...
Welcome to This Week in Softball - The Bingo Long Traveling All-Stars Edition
It was a brutal week for the Bush Pilots. A doubleheader was played last night. The men fought valiantly. No, we take that back. The team sucked last night.
Onto the lowlights....
THE GAME
There were not one, but two, vicious beatdowns last night as Team Bush was crushed by both Futaba and Players, 12-1 and 14-5, respectively. Many errors and of course, poor hitting contributed to these debacles. The only highlight was that we had Nipsy Russell the Ump back in the house for Game 1 against Futaba.
However, despite the losses last night, we fuggin' ate better than anyone after the game.
So there. Take that rest of the league.
WELCOME BACK BEAN
The Bush Pilots Softball Club would like to welcome back, our man, Mike "Mr. Bean" McGlinnen to the team. Bean has taken time out to get married and have two kids, and has now realized, with three woman in his house, he has an incredible need to escape.
When asked how it felt to be back on the diamond again, Bean replied quite simply, "It felt good."
Welcome back Bean!
YOU EVER SEEN A GROWN MAN NAKED?
Upon arrival at Rotunda Fields, Dusty decided he had better hit the head and relieve himself before taking the field. As he made his way through the entrance to the Auschwitz bathroom, Dusty was horrified to see a naked man, towelling off after using the horrendous looking showers (see the post from last week's TWIS regarding how nasty the shower room is). Dusty had not planned on seeing a naked man and was obviously traumatized. This trauma carried over to the field and later to the parking lot. Dusty has scheduled an hour of time with Dr. Frasier Crane today to discuss how he feels about this and how he now can't get the song, "It's Raining Men" out of his head.
We here at TWIS wish him well with his therapy.
FUTABA
Did we mention, we got our asses kicked, 12-1, by Futaba? We here at TWIS like to say "Futaba". It just sounds dirty.
SHINY SHORTS
Here is our man, Eleazar, a.k.a., "Big Country. We here at TWIS congratulate him on his fine fashion sense.
Check out these shiny shorts he is sportin'. It looks like something a super hero would wear. We think a cape and mask would complete the look.
BINGO LONG
Who the fug is Bingo Long you ask?
Well, Bingo Long and his Traveling All-Stars was a movie made in the 70's, with Billy Dee (Colt 45) Williams. It featured a Harlem Globetrotter-like, baseball team, that traveled the country putting on exhibitions. Well, the team we played in the second game, the Players, were just like that. They sang, danced, and chanted shit on their bench throughout the night. We had to listen to that bullshit through two games.
The Playas could play some ball though and were nice dudes.
Stay tuned for the sequel, "Bean Short and his Stay-at-Home Bush Pilots".
This movie is being shot in Dearborn utilizing Michigan's film tax credit and will star the real Mr. Bean, Rowan Atkinson.
OVERHEARD QUOTES
These gems were overheard muttered by various Bush Pilot personnel prior to our game with The Players....
"We don't stand a snowman's chance in hell."
"You've heard of the 'Miracle on Ice'? We need 'Miracle on Field' to beat these guys. We don't have (famous 1980 Olympic Hockey coach) Herb Brooks. We've got Herb Semens."
"The over-under is 20 runs for them, 2 for us. Who wants in on this action."
SHEED!
It was mentioned that The Players first baseman looked like former Piston, Rasheed Wallace. He really did look like 'Sheed, didn't he?
NOMAR!
Our man Dave was on the bench with Coach Proc and Proc's nephew Neil. At one point he said, "Doesn't that dude over there (on The Players team) look like (former MLB player) Nomar Garciaparra?"
To which Coach Proc and Neil both said "Which one?"
Uh, yeah. How about the ONLY one it could be? Token Garciaparra. Geez.
We here at TWIS can only shake our head at Coach Proc and Neil for their incredible oversight.
DANCING WITH THE STARS
During the first game, Focker was overheard saying something about, "Dancing with the Bush Pilots". We have no idea what the fug he was talking about, but look for a Bush Pilot team member to be on the hit TV show this fall.
We knew you could dance, Hose!
"K"RAMER SUPER MODEL
"K"ramer was like a super model last night, posing for pictures with his tri tip. He was walkin' the Rotunda catwalk...
Mr. James Cramer, and incredible tri-tip prior to grilling.
Jimmy's pre-grill set up.
The marinade was fantastic.
Friggin' Yum. We believe it was Dawg who said the tri tip was "Ridiculously good." You da man, "K"ramer!
JOERN THE PHOTOGRAPHER
We'd like to thank Joern for taking pictures last night.
Nice shot of some of the fellas here.
And here is one of Focker, contemplating life.
NATTY TIME!
We' like to thank Mr. Gaylord Focker for bringing team beers last night. Focker went all out and supplied the squad with Bush Lights and Natty Lights. We thank you, sir.
Also, thank you to Dugger too for bringing the Michelob Lights. It was quite the Anheuser Busch Pilots product night.
While the Natty Light reminded us all of beer seltzer water, it was quite refreshing on a warm, summer night.
NEXT WEEK
We have another doubleheader (6:30/7:40) next week. Same fields as this week. We need all hands on deck again. We should have BigAl, Gladiator, Jeremy, etc., back out next week. T.C, dude, are you alive? Next week, let's get 15 guys on hand so we can rotate in and out over the two games and start the party early. Coach Proc will be in Chicago Monday through Wednesday visiting the hallowed confines of Wrigley Field, but will be back for the game, however he most likely won't be sending out the pre-game email.
And....Bring $1 for the umps next week. We have enough cash to pay for one more game only, so we'll need to bring ump money from here on out. Seriously, we will have to collect a buck each week so bring it. No excuses. Put a $1 in your car's console today after you hit the drive thru, so you'll have it on hand.
Who is bringing something for the grill for next week...VOLUNTEER and email us to let us know!
Tiger Woods, Mickey Mouse, Those who fart at will, People who indulge on sausage, Freesytle whizzers, and those named Schultz, Salazar and Yjorn...
Welcome to This Week in Softball - The European on My Car Edition
It was a beautiful night for softball. Temps were in the low 80s, the sky was blue, babies were everywhere and the Bush Pilots lost.
Ah, normalcy.
Onto the game...
THE GAME
The Bush Pilots got out to an 8-1 lead over the Mustangs last night. It appeared that Team Bush would finally get their second win of the season. But no. Some fielding gaffs and a complete lack of hitting after the 5th inning and the Pilots dropped one, 10-9, in extra innings last night.
However, our man Dugger struck out 3 (or was it 4) batters last night setting a career high. Nolan Ryan Dugger was on fire. Seriously, how can that many people strike out in SLOW PITCH softball? You usually get one or two, but not 3 or more.
SAUSAGE KING OF DEARBORN OR A MIGHTY WIND
"I'm full of sausage and beer." - Dubya
He was full of shit too. Literally. Damn Dubya stunk. He was on the bench farting to beat the band. He laid out a cloud of stank so bad, it wafted past Coach Proc on the bench, who immediately had to fight the downwind stench and move. Dubya deemed his gas as "evil". This was a direct result of all the beer he drank and all the sausages he put down at the Tigers-Nationals game. By the time Dubya hit Rotunda Fields, the sausages and beer had manifested themselves into the cloud of death.
We hear at TWIS suggest Beano before eating any gas causing foods. Dubya, please take note of this.
ST. LOUIS SANS?
Mitchy's lovely wife, Sandy, was on hand to watch us last night. She was sporting a nice, red visor with "STL" on it. Well, as we all know this is the logo of the St. Louis Cardinals.
When asked what the logo stood for, Sandy replied, "San Lodge".
Alirghty then.
We here at TWIS will leave the meaning of the "T" in the logo to interpretation.
HELIHOSE?
The University of Michigan -- GO BLUE! -- medical helicopter flew overhead last night. This prompted us to realize that our man of medical, Hose, was not in the house. Schmenge commented, "Was Hose called into duty on his way to the game?"
We don't believe he was called in, but would bet he was taking his wife out to dinner for their 4th anniversary. Congrats to Mr. Hose (Jason) and Mrs. Hose (Amy).
BUSH PILOT FARM SYSTEM
The youngest Bush Pilot, Baby Schmenge made his was up to Rotunda last night. Baby Reid is the man. And, as you can see here, our man is sporting the logo of the Bush Pilots, which, coincidentally, was designed by his proud momma, Kimmie.
We here at Team Bush believe you are never too young to start your traning on being a Bush Pilot.
Stay tuned next week as Baby Schmenge pees on someone's car and picks up cans.
Damn if this picture isn't cute. Makes us want to squish the little fella.
THE SCHULTZ THROW
Years ago, our second baseman was Mike Schultz. He was part of a play that was to become the stuff of legends. You see, Mike was playing second base. There was a man on first and the ball was hit to the shortstop (either Dugger or Jump we believe), who then flipped it to Mike who stepped on the bag and turned to fire to Proc at first base. At this point, Mike threw the ball, 95 miles an hour, STRAIGHT INTO THE BACK OF THE DUDE SLIDING INTO SECOND BASE. As reported over the generations, this throw, would go on to known as, "The Schultz Throw." It would become legendary. Mythic almost.
And then, last night, out of nowhere, Mike showed up to the game (he lives here part-time and in Orlando, Florida near Tiger Woods and Mickey Mouse). After the game, during post-game libations and sausage, he began to tell his version of the story. He claimed he was going to complete the double play throw, but that Coach Proc was not on first base, so he tried to hold up the throw and ended up whipping it into the poor bastard's back, and subsequently emptying both benches.
Coach Proc laughed and said no way, he was ready for the throw and watched the entire play take place. Dawg and Mitchy backed up Coach Proc's version and thus a new controversey has been born. Its like the Kennedy assassination thing. Was there another shooter on the grassy knoll? Was Coach Proc looking away and thus the cause of "The Schultz Throw"?
Fuck no. Mike threw it like an ass wipe as anyone that was there will tell you.
Until a Bush Pilot, "Zapruder" film of this shows, up, we are sticking by the original version of the story.
MITCHY TRAINS FOR RETIREMENT JOB
Planning for retirement isn't easy.
You have to sock money away, meet up with financial advisors, decided on where to live and in general, plan for you future as a retiree.
That is why we here at TWIS recommend the Can Return Al Investment Plan. In as little as two hours, you too, can train for a great, retirement career in can collecting returning.
Start your retirement career training today....
You'll learn things like:
How to professionally pick up cans.
How to just say "no" to bottles.
How to eat fresh spaghetti at The Ponderosa.
How to use "the claw" to pick up empties that are out of your reach or that you are too lazy to bend over for.
How to look stylish with your pants pulled up to your tits.
How to drive a banged up, gold Taurus and get the chicks.
This can be all yours for the price of a bag of empties when you sign up for the Can Return Al Investment Plan.
As you can see here, our man Mitchy has signed up and is learning at the hands of Yoda CRA.
WHO IS TOM?
For the second week in a row, Dubya didn't know one of his teammates. Coach Proc was talking about Tom Skelly, to which Dubya said, "Who is Tom?".
Next week, would each of you take time out and introduce yoursleves and your real names to George "Dubya" Galay so he'll know who the fuck you are.
Thank you.
ROTUNDA AUSCHWITZ?
Coach Proc, Dawg and Schmenge walked to the restrooms last night. While this isn't shocking, it should be noted that it wasn't quite dark enough to relieve onself outside, so the walk commenced. After doing their duty, the three adventurers looked in the back of the restroom to see there were showers there. You see, back in its heyday, Rotunda was THE place to be for softball, tournaments, etc., and like the rest of the Detroit area, it has fallen into disrepair.
Schmenge likened the shower room to Auschwitz.
If you look at a picture of the real Auschwitz and Rotunda, its not that far off.
Man, what a creepy place.
BRING FOOD!
Coach Proc would like to thank himself for bringing food --- again. Alright people. Time to step up. Proc has brought chow three times. Mitchy, Focker and Dubya have contributed to the other games.
Who is next? Dugger...you got enough venison to feed 15+ people?
BRING BEER!
People, you know you play softball on Thursday. Put a cooler in your ride and make the 5-minute stop for a six or twelve pack and some ice on the way to the game. Its pretty simple. Party store will get you in and out quickly.
WORLD CUP
As this is being written, Team Germany is losing in the World Cup of soccer. Do we really care? No, but we hope for Team Bush's friend, Yjorn from Germany, that the Germans can prevail. Go Deutschland!
MAN, ER, CHICK IN BLACK
Mitchy's daughter Holly was dressed all in black last night and reminded us of Johnny Cash.
Here, Coach Proc requests Holly play, "I Walk The Line".
Here is the real Man in Black performing "I Walk The Line"....
GREG NORTH?
Why is it, UPS Greg looks like so many famous people?
Last night, Dugger's son Jordan, kept referring to him as TV sitcom star, Ray Ramano (of "Everybody Loves Raymond") and Dugger kept saying he looks like adult film star, Peter North. We here at TWIS have always though he looked like Channel 4 weatherman, Chuck Gadica, but we may have to rethink this.
So who do you think UPS looks like? The Peter North comparison is pretty damn close, isn't it?
PEEING ON CARS OR IN STREET TALK -- EUROPEAN ON MY CAR
Late last night, as Dawg, Coach Proc and Schmenge returned from the Auschwitz restroom, Drunk Focker decided he has to pee too. But, this son bitch didn't walk to the can, no sir, he just opened up the door on Coach Proc's Fusion and started to whiz. No mind, you he was whizzing on the ground, but an infuriated Coach Proc, gave him a Kung Fu kick to the ass which prompted some overspray that had to be cleaned up.
Next time you will walk to Auschwitz, Focker!
NEXT WEEK
Next week we have a doubleheader. Game 1 is at 6:30 at field #5 against Futaba. Game #2 is right after that on Field #6 against the brother team, Players.
BRING FOOD. BRING BEER. BRING YOURSELF.
We need all hands on deck for these games. T.C. and Bean will both be back in the house next week!
Have a great week everyone and don't piss on anything you shouldn't.
